


love is buying you your perfect couch

by Magicath808



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Adam is not dead, Allura is not dead, Basically everyone is happy and alive, Bisexual Lance, Cussing, Didn't Know They Were Dating, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Gay Keith (Voltron), Happy Ending, Lotor isn't dead or a villian, M/M, Minor Acxa/Veronica (Voltron), Minor Shiro/Adam, No coming out, Pining, Pining Lance (Voltron), Post Season 8, Shared apartment, Smooching, Tender - Freeform, allura/lotor implied, and they were ROOMMATES, basically everyone's alive, bed sharing, but this fic is mainly about lance and keith, cuz i said so, it's just a big fluffy mess to be honest, just talking about therapy and lack of sleep, lance already knows, light angst tho?, like very tender and sappy, non-canon compliant, post canon klance, post-s8, small amount of ptsd but nothing serious, so much pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-27
Updated: 2020-02-27
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:20:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22915381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magicath808/pseuds/Magicath808
Summary: Just two bros, leasing an apartment together, being domestic, staring into each other’s eyes, sharing a bed. Oh wait. Oh shit. Maybe there’s something more going on here.ORLong after the war, after everything has settled down, Lance and Keith move in together for convenience.
Relationships: Keith/Lance (Voltron)
Comments: 88
Kudos: 708





	love is buying you your perfect couch

**Author's Note:**

> I haven’t written a fic in so long so please be patient with me. This fic doesn’t really go anywhere, but the idea has just been threatening to spill out of my brain for forever. So take this super tender, sappy klance. Also, the theme song for this fic is Talk Me Down by Troy Sivan, if you want some ambiance.

love is buying you your perfect couch

prologue

Lance was on the couch, head cushioned by the too many decorative pillows he had insisted on buying, trying to fall asleep. The lights were dimmed, his favorite lo-fi was playing on the tv, creating a relaxing background, and his favorite moisturizer was rubbed into his skin. But no matter how much he tried he just couldn’t get comfortable. He had been trying to fall asleep in his king-sized bed for the past two hours, but with little luck, he had moved into the living room, like he used to do when he was a kid. But it had little effect on him. 

He didn’t understand it. He had slept alone practically his whole life, minus all the times he had snuck into a siblings room or his parents bed as a child. Lance loved a good sleepover, and sure, he liked a good cuddle session, but if he was being honest with himself, he tended to like sleeping alone, spreading out amongst the cool sheets. He wasn’t used to sleeping with someone else, not long term. 

That was until two years ago. 

At the end of the war he had been nineteen. Having done and been through so much and he hadn't been sure how to go forward. Allura had gone to New Altea, and it had become so clear, so apparent, that they just weren’t meant to be. And without the war, without a reason to hang onto Allura and feel like he needed to support her, their relationship had ended. And he felt so free, and Allura had too, which was a relief really. 

But Lance still felt lost. He didn’t have to save the world, he didn’t have to be anything or anyone. He had gone back to the farm, but that grew dull after a while. So he went back to the Garrison, he went back to school. And by twenty-six he had a full time job teaching the next generation of pilots. And Lance loved it, he really did. Except he felt so isolated, his friends scattered across the galaxies doing amazing things. Sure he saw Shiro and Pidge from time to time, sure Hunk texted him constantly, but it wasn’t the same as being a Paladin. That’s what he found he missed the most. All the adventures he had had, they had been fun, a once in a lifetime experience. But just hanging out with his friends? That was the thing he truly missed, all of them all in one place laughing and bickering. 

But at twenty-six in a small room at the Garrison, he had felt entirely alone in a way he had never really experienced, not when he was a Cadet, not when he lived on the Castle of Lions or on the Atlas, especially not at home. It was more than loneliness, it was something deeper, sadder, like he was a single grain of sand on a beach, undistinguishable, lost amongst the waves. 

As it turned out, even when you were a formerly famous, reality-saving hero, a teacher's salary wasn’t much. So he began to save his pennies, hoping that by the time he was thirty-five he would be able to afford his own place. Because it was either that or find a rich boyfriend or girlfriend he could move in with. 

But neither of those things ended up happening. Instead, he had called his best friend. And in a very un-Keith-like speech, Keith had complained right back to Lance. Keith told him how New Daibazall was too far away from everyone and that the soap smelled bad and that the food was weird and that he missed home, his real home. He told Lance that he was ready to step down from the being leader of the blades, that he was ready to hand the reins over to someone else. That seven years, bumping around planet to planet, was enough for one man. He wasn’t quite ready to quit, but he was ready to have a break, to breath again. 

And in a rush of words Lance asked him to move in, and because Keith was his best friend, he said yes. With little money between them, teachers and peace core leaders got paid next to nothing after all, they were able to buy a single room apartment together. Lance often spent break back in Cuba or on small missions around the galaxy, and Keith, while not the leader, still had relatively few breaks, so they figured a single apartment would be fine, they would be able to split it. 

This had all worked in theory, but not in practice. Keith’s breaks rarely aligned with when Lance was gone. And on that first night when Keith had stumbled in from a mission, exhausted to his wits end, he had made his way to the couch ready to crash. But Lance had promptly punched Keith in the shoulder and said, “don’t be weird.” And then he dragged Keith to the bed. And as Lance had urged Keith to do, they hadn’t let it get weird between them, they simply shared a bed.

And this happened every night they were both home.

Soon there was a routine between them. Keith and Kosmo would get Lance up for a morning jog before his classes. They would share breakfast before he left. Lance would come home and they would watch tv and eat dinner and just settle into each other's company. It was so different for them, relaxing, not having to worry about war or drama between them, and if Lance was honest, this was what he had always wanted with Keith, easy companionable friendship. And that’s what it was, they just also sometimes cuddled on the couch and slept in the same bed. 

What was weird was that now for some reason, two years after they had been living together, Lance couldn’t seem to fall asleep by himself. Keith had been gone on this mission for a week, and Lance knew it would be several more weeks before he came home. And without Keith or even Kosmo, the bed had just felt too big and empty. 

And that was part of the reason why Lance had ended up on the couch, trying to fall asleep. 

He didn’t know what he hated more: the dark circles that were surely forming under his eyes, or his stupid dependence on a bedmate to fall alseep. 

Lance groaned and rolled over. It was beyond dumb. Last month Keith had been gone for three weeks and it had almost killed him and his complection. But the coldness beside him, the absence of Keith’s heavy breathing, the feeling of knowing someone was there, especially someone that would probably kill for him, without all that, it was impossible to feel at ease enough to fall asleep. 

And this time it was even worse, Lance realized. 

It felt like there was a dull ache with Keith’s absence. Lance would turn around, ready to say something witty, something that would tug Keith’s lips into a gentle smile, only for him not to be there. He would get home wanting to tell someone, _Keith_ , about his day, and he would remember that Keith was still in space, impossibly far away from him, probably with bad cell service and even worse phone answering skills. And worse of all, Lance would look at the huge white bed, a bed he had specifically splurged on because it was good for his back, and he would look at it with disdain. And today had just been the last straw. After trying to fall asleep for two hours, he had practically given up and thus ended up on the couch, hoping that the couch would not be tied to Keith in this stupid way the bed seemed to be. 

It was ridiculous Lance told himself, to be clingy because his best friend was absent. He hadn’t acted this downright high school, _childish_ , since back on the Castle Ship all those years ago when Lance _was_ in high school and Pidge and Hunk had teamed up against him when Allura had been busy with Lotor. Lance thought back at that. Keith had been gone then too. Lance pushed those thoughts away; bad memories could start nightmares. 

The couch did not seem to be helping, but he still didn't want to go back to the bed.

Then he got an idea. 

He got up off the couch and stalked to his, _their_ , bedroom. Lance had decorated it with pictures of their adventures from back in the day, of him and his friends, a particularly great one of Keith with Red by the bathroom door. Lance shook his head and turned to Keith’s side of the room. 

In the nightstand drawer was Keith’s old Malmorian blade. Keith had gotten his own forged when he had been elected leader of the blades. Lance new he preferred his mother’s blade, it had been his constant reminder of who he was, but Galra customs and etiquette had insisted he use one forged for him specifically. His mother had already had a new one forged and so nobody had needed the second blade. Even though he had turned the reins as leader over to Axca, he still used his new blade, leaving the old one here for safe keeping.

Lance took the blade in his hand letting his fingers graze the edge. It reminded him of so many things, a past Keith that was distant but not quite forgotten. A Keith that was surely and hot-headed, a Keith that, in memory, made Lance smile. 

He took the blade back with him to the couch and placed it on the coffee table, a much safer alternative to Keith, who liked to have it under his pillow until Lance had cut his hand on it one night. That’s how it had gotten annexed to the drawer. It was silly, but it made him at least feel like Keith could be close. 

Lance sighed and allowed himself to fall into the steady hum of the music.

Maybe it was because he was tired from his kids running him around, maybe it was the fact that the blade was there, safeguarding him in some way, but Lance finally drifted to sleep.

  
  


chapter one

  
  


Lance woke up to a loud bang. Instinct took over and Lance was on his feet, knife held out in front of him. For someone who hadn’t wielded a weapon, much less a blade, in more than ten years, his instincts had him holding the knife with confidence. A confidence that only came from having seen too much, from having so much expected of you. 

A dark shadow huddled near the door, light backlit the figure, making it indiscernible. Lance bent forward on his toes, waiting for movement. 

“Lance?” A familiar voice said, a voice that was gruff and yet somehow soft enough to tingle up Lance’s spine.

The tension leaked out of Lance. He tossed the knife away from him, somewhat sad that he had so readily grabbed at it without a thought, like he was still seventeen and he was expected to be on guard at all times. 

“Jeez Louise, Keith, you scared me there.”

The lights flickered on, “Sorry. Would have been quieter if I knew you were sleeping out here.”

For a moment Lance felt his breath kicked out of him. Keith was still in his Malmorian suit, tired and grumpy, and from the look of his disheveled hair and the dark circles under his eyes, he must have flown straight here, an almost twenty-hour journey through time and space and galaxies. But he was _here_. 

“Why are you in here anyway?” Keith asked to Lance's silent stare.

A pause. 

“You’re not supposed to be back yet,” Lance said. His voice almost sounded broken, Lance wished he could take it back. Say what he really meant, _I missed you._

Keith scrunched up his nose, “Would you like me to leave?” He said his voice was part exhausted, part jest. 

“I’m glad you’re back,” Lance said in a rush. He stepped around the couch, “I just didn't expect you back is all.”

Keith shrugged, “Only here for a couple of days. Just needed to come home.” Keith said all this like it wasn’t a big deal, like he didn’t have other friends he could go to, like he didn’t have a mother and a whole planet that would gladly welcome him, like Lance was his home to go back to. 

Keith stalked toward Lance. For a moment he thought Keith would hug him, but he only walked past, letting their shoulders brush against each other. He headed toward the bedroom, no doubt ready to pass out for the next fourteen hours. Lance knew Keith had difficulty sleeping in space, said it always bothered him. And the first couple days he was back, he would sleep like the dead. 

Lance grabbed at Keith’s shoulder, “Where do you think you’re going? You aren’t getting into my bed all grimmy and sweaty.”

“You weren’t even sleeping in it,” Keith said in mock exacerbation.

Lance knew this game. It had been the core of their friendship for years. He smiled into the game with ease, with fondness, “Up ba, ba, ba, ba, no you don’t.” He grabbed Keith by the elbow and steared him into their bathroom. 

Lance turned on the shower, holding out his hand to make sure the temperature was just right, before digging through their stack of clean towels. He handed Keith one of his own sets, Keith’s being in such a ratty and worn state because he was unwilling to throw away anything. Keith stood there and let himself be bossed around. The only indication that Lance knew Keith secretly loved being taken care of like this was the gentle fondness in his gaze. _Everyone deserves a little pampering_ , Lance thought, especially his best friend who gave his entire soul to the universe. 

Lance moved out of the bathroom to give Keith his privacy. He then went into their bedroom to grab a set of Keith’s pj’s. He settled on a simple t-shirt and sweatpants and went back into the now steam filled bathroom. “Do you want anything to eat?” Lance asked.

“What we got?” Keith called from behind the shower curtain. 

“Chinese leftovers, and some weird alien recipe Hunk made me try out.”

“Your mom hasn’t bought anything over?” Keith asked hopeful.

“Nope. Unfortunately I finished off whatever she left last week.”

“Chinese then. Definitely Chinese.”

Lance chuckled and went off to heat up the leftovers. 

Keith came out some time later, his hair still damp and curling around his shoulders. It made Lance want to brush and blow dry him, something he figured Keith would have little patience for. 

Lance gentured to the plate of food and it didn’t take long for Keith to sit down and start shoveling it down.

“See. I knew you were hungry.”

Keith flicked his eyes at Lance, “Never said I wasn’t.”

“Yeah, but if I wasn’t here, you would have just gone to bed, no food, no shower. You probably flew straight here with no bathroom breaks.”

“Good thing you’re here then,” Keith said to his Chinese food. 

Lance let those words hang against his skin. _Good thing you’re here._ It made him feel something he thought he hadn’t felt in a very long time. 

“Kosmo’s not here,” Lance said. 

“Since I’m going back Wednesday, I thought I shouldn't put him through all the travel.”

“Wednesday?” Lance said. That was three days from then. 

“I told you I was here for only a couple days.”

“But that’s so soon,” Lance said. _Why even come back for that time at all_ , Lance wondered. 

“Did you miss me?” Keith said. 

Lance looked up, expecting a smirk, a taunt, but Keith’s look was sincere. Lance’s stomach leaped. _Yes_ , he wanted to say, “You’re going to miss your appointment with Dr. Karr again,” he said instead.

Dr. Karr was their therapist, one of the only free benefits they were receiving from the Garrison, mostly due to Shiro pushing on Iverson a few years back after cadets were struggling to assimilate back into a peaceful world. When Shiro finally became the General of the Garrison in the next few years, as was bound to happen, he had no doubt he and Adam would be making some serious changes to how the Garrison was run and operated. 

“Damn. I missed last week’s phone appointment too,” Keith said. 

“I know,” Lance wiggled his eyebrows, “She’s not very happy with you.”

Keith sighed, “How are your appointments going?”

“Great,” Lance said. They really were going well. His time with Dr. Karr was precious, even if he only went twice a month now. 

“You aren’t having nightmares, again are you?” Keith asked.

Lanced tucked a hand under his chin, “Why do you ask?”

Keith gestured to the couch, “You were sleeping out here. My knife.”

“Sorry,” Lance said turning away, “I shouldn’t have borrowed it.”

“I’m not mad, I’m concerned, Lance.” 

_Lance_. It was only his name, but somehow when Keith said it, the word pinged into the deepest alcolves of his heart. 

“It wasn’t a nightmare. I just couldn’t sleep.”

“And the knife?” Keith said leaning toward Lance, eyes dark and wide and so hard to lie to. 

“Just…”

Keith pressed forward a breath away, “Just?”

“Didn’t feel safe. Without you here I guess.” he tucked his chin into his body, “You know my dad used to have the nightshift, back before the farm, my mom used to not be able to sleep. Thought a burglar would come in. It was like that,” Lance said. _God this tongue he had_ , Lance thought.

And then he reddend at the implication that Keith and him were the same as his father was to his mother. 

Keith’s brows knitted together. He opened his mouth like he was about to say something. 

Lance grabbed at his empty plate and stood up, dropping it into the sink for tomorrow. “I’ll talk to Dr. Karr about it,” Lance gave a light chuckled, “Maybe I just need to keep a rifle under the bed.” Keith looked further concerned. 

Maybe it was true though. Every time Lance thought he had escaped from the war, it would sneak up on him again. He and his friends always seemed to be in a process of recovery. There had been many nights of him waking in a panic and having to cry into Keith’s willing shoulder. There had been many of the same nights for Keith, Lance waking to screams or the chattering of teeth. They had survived in all the ways that really mattered, but that didn’t mean it was easy. 

Keith reached out, taking Lance’s wrist. They had been living together so long now that Lance didn’t even have to hear Keith voice his concerns to understand his worry. It was in his eyes, his furrowed brow. 

“Sorry. Bad joke. It’s nothing. I just missed you,” he said this lightly, but those words, _that he missed Keith_ , brought a heaviness to his chest. It wasn’t nothing. He didn’t just miss Keith. It was so much more than that. 

“Well I’m here now,” Keith said with a tentative smile.

Lance carefully dragged his hand away, “That you are.”

He returned Keith’s smile. And it was okay. Lance didn’t need to think about the subtext of their conversation, or the way Keith’s eyes followed him, or the weird aching feeling in his chest. He could just lock it all away. All that mattered was that Keith was here and he didn’t have to miss him anymore. 

They locked up the apartment and went to bed. 

As Lance snuggled under the sheets, he turned to Keith. He wasn’t sure if Keith was still awake but he tried anyway, “Speaking of couches…”

“We weren’t,” Keith said gruffly into his pillow.

“Ours is not great on the back.”

“Then don’t sleep on it.”

“It’s too small, for like, guests. We need more room.”

“Hmm,” Keith said. 

“Do you think we can afford a new one?”

“Making it a habit of sleeping out there?”

“I just want Hunk and Pidge to stop saying they’re squished every time they come over. I want to stop sitting on the floor everytime we want to stretch out when watching a movie.”

“Shiro said you would be getting a bonus this year.”

“Wait really? This isn’t nepotism is it?”

“Maybe a little?”

“Honestly I don’t think I care,” Lance said smugly. It was already October. They could buy the couch now and it wouldn’t be too much of a stretch to make it to Christmas. 

As he drifted off to sleep, Keith’s deep breathing close to his ear, Lance remembered something he had heard years ago about falling asleep next to people, how it deeped bonds and trust. It wasn’t just about the warmth of another person next to you Lance thought. It was the fact that the someone next to him was Keith. That was what made him feel at ease. That’s what he felt like whenever Keith was by his side, ease. 

With that in mind, Lance finally fell into a deep and dreamless sleep. 

  
  


chapter two

  
  


That next week, Lance was sleeping out in the living room, the major reason being that he, once again, could not sleep. The second reason was because the day after Lance had mentioned wanting the new piece of furniture, he had come home to a new, very large, very plush, couch, and it was so comfortable that he basically didn’t want to leave it. 

Lance had been flabbergasted when he had come home, and honestly a little mad that Keith hadn’t included him in the picking process, especially because the couch seemed to be expensive. But the anger hadn’t lasted long because the couch was nice, that, and he was maybe a little too used to Keith’s impulsiveness. So he let go of his anger and let himself enjoy it. The couch was a nice grey color, which matched their apartment’s theme, a mix between shabby college student and minimalistic chic. 

The day after the couch, Lance had woken up to his phone calender warning him that it was Keith’s birthday. And that had started a whole fiasco in itself. Lance had rushed around after work, grabbing Keith’s favorite take out. Then he had practically sprinted to their favorite bakery to buy a slightly over the top birthday cake, half of which was still in the fridge due to the fact that Keith loved this particular mint ice cream cake that Lance couldn’t stand. 

Lance had come to Keith dead asleep on the couch and was able to set up dinner without waking him. Keith had seemed so stunned when Lance had yelled 'happy birthday' in his face. Keith hadn’t even remembered it was his own birthday, but to be fair Lance had forgotten too between the hustle and bustle of Keith coming and going those last few months. Keith's surprise had quickly turned into adoration. His look was so soft that Lance had to excuse himself to the bathroom to hide the deep blush on his face.

A longing had ached into Lance. _What is this?_ He had wondered. It felt like his heart was trying to beat its way out of his chest, which could only mean one thing. And it was a thing too noticeable, even for Lance’s great ability to deny.

That evening they had wrestled over the remote, Keith wanting an action movie Lance wanting to watch what was basically the Altean version of _Mamma Mia_ , again. The wrestling turned rough because even though Keith was now thirty-one and Lance wasn’t far behind him, their competitive streak was still right under the surface. But since it was Keith’s birthday, Lance let him have the remote, or that’s what he had told Keith. It was definitely not the fact that Keith had pinned him down when Lance had made to lick the remote. It wasn’t Keith bearing his weight on him, eyes dark and lips mere inches away doing unexpected things to Lance.

Even though the couch was big enough for both of them to stretch out on, Keith had thrown himself down next to Lance, and as the movie went on, they stretched out until Keith’s head was in Lance’s lap and Lance’s hands were absently combing through Keith’s knotty hair. 

Lance kept sneaking glances at Keith. He was bathed in the half light of the tv screen, brows knitted in concentration. His muscled arms were crossed over his chest, mouth set in a pout. Lance kept thinking that he wanted to kiss those brows, kiss that quirking mouth. But he pushed it away as a silly thought.

Keith had glanced back at him, his eyes blacker than their usual unnerving purple. There was something so warm about those eyes. Lance tried to remember when Keith had lost all coldness towards him, but he couldn’t. It had been so long ago. 

Keith raised an eyebrow, a silent, “You good?” and Lance looked away perplexed. Something stirred his stomach when Keith looked at him that way. Something warm and thick like honey. This feeling picked up even more so as Keith fingers brushed against his ankle. Lance felt a pull in his gut. What did Lance want exactly? _Just to feel his skin? Just feel his nearness? Why did he want that?_ The dizzying heat picked up again, raising goosebumps up his arms. 

And now here he was, trying to fall asleep, this time not so much missing Keith’s presence as flustered by his memories. Yes he missed Keith, if anything the longing he felt was deeper, stronger, but longing was now undercut by a deep abyss of feelings that Lance didn’t want to get into. Lance dragged his hand over the back of the couch. It really was the perfect couch. How had Keith known exactly what he would want? It wasn’t hard to pick out a couch that was bigger, that of course would have made Lance happy. But this was something more. The couch was the right color, the right texture, the right everything. Lance knew Keith didn’t really care about the specifics, especially when it came to furniture of all things. He had been happy sleeping on a futon after all. It was only Lance’s insistence that their apartment looked halfway put together as it was. So why had he been able to pick out a couch? 

Lance tried to imagine Keith at a store patiently talking with a sales person going over sizes and styles and colors. He couldn’t imagine it. The Keith he knew would point to the first couch he saw and say 'good enough.'

Lance leaned against the couch. It seemed to hug him back. It was everything he would have picked out for himself, soft cotton rather than a slippery leather, overstuffed, but still hard so you didn’t sink into it too much. It was a couch that would get better with time. It was a couch that said “we are going to be together for awhile” and “I’m committed to you.”

Lance’s breath hitched. Because without really knowing, without really asking, Keith had known exactly what Lance would have wanted. He didn’t want to get his hopes up, especially because he wasn’t quite entirely sure or ready to admit why his pulse was racing. But the idea, that Keith knew him so well, that he went out and bought Lance a couch simply because he had said something when he was half asleep. That meant something didn’t it?

Lance picked up his phone and called the one person he knew would give him a straight answer. She also happened to probably be the only person up at this hour, space time zones and everything accounted for.

Allura, bless her soul, picked up on the first ring. 

“Lance you are officially my best friend.”

“What did I do,” Lance laughed as her face came on the screen. She was as beautiful as always her hair was shorter, but she mostly looked the same, perhaps more queenly. 

“You just got me out of a very boring meeting.”

“I’m glad,” Lance smiled. “So what’s up?”

“I don’t know. You called me remember?” Allura laughed.

After their break up Allura had gone to new Altea to rule her people. She was trying to make the planet more democratic, with little success so far, but she was ruling beautifully anyway, setting up infrastructure and aid to Altea and around the galaxies. She had saved the realities, but she still sought to do more, even trying to build a new Voltron, albeit with little success, but still, she just never stopped. Lance was happy that she still found time to talk with him, with all of them. Because while they might not have made the best couple, while they couldn’t romantically make each other happy, Allura really was the friend he felt he could confide the most in, besides Keith anyway. 

“Er right,” Lance said. “I need a straight answer here, well not straight.” Lance babbled scrunching through his hair suddenly nervous. Yes Allura had talked about all her suitors and dates with him, even bringing up how a certain purple prince was adjusting to his duties as royal scientist and engineer, after his intensive recovery from being possessed by his mother. And if that hadn’t been awkward for their relationship, this shouldn’t be either.

He took a deep breath “Do you think I’m in love with Keith?” Lance said. And it was out of his mouth, he had said it. It felt all of a sudden more real, more dangerous, like his feelings would avalanche on top of him.

“I should hope so, you’re dating him.” Allura said blunt as day. 

Lance felt his face blush, “Er. what?”

Allura covered her mouth, but didn’t quite look sorry, “You’re not? I thought when two humans move into a single household they were partnered, or at least in serious courtship.”

“I mean you aren’t entirely wrong, but we were just friends, roommates. I thought.”

“You thought?” Allura said a smile on her lips.

“Yes? No? I don’t know.”

Allura massaged her temple. “I truly thought you two would have figured out your shit by now.” Shiro had taught Allura Earthen swear words awhile back, and she had taken instantly to them.

_What did that mean?_ Lance thought.

Allura looked tentatively at Lance, “So you haven’t…”

“No. God no. Nothing close to that.”

She nodded solemnly. “We thought you guys had been together for awhile and just didn’t say anything.” Lance wondered who she meant by “we.” She continued, “There was that time at your family’s Christmas party a few years back, we all thought you two were sneaking off together.”

Lance tried to remember when that could have been but came up with nothing. It was true they would often turn into bed together, especially when at Lance’s parents house. But there were so many parties and get togethers, where Keith had sought out quiet time or Lance had gone after Keith just to have some space from everyone else. He guessed that could look a certain way.

Lance could feel a pout coming on, and Allura must have too because she gave him a stern look, “Why do you think you _aren’t_ together? You live together, you two are closer than anyone I know.”

“That’s the thing,” Lance said, “Now that I’m feeling this way--”

Allura gave him another of her queenly gazes. 

“Fine. Now that I’m starting to _admit_ I feel a certain way about a certain mullet I just don’t get where the line is. We sleep in the same bed, we cuddle, we even hold hands, we’re pretty fucking domestic. Is the only differnece between a relationship and a friendship not having sex?”

“We didn’t have sex,” Allura said not unkindly. 

“Yeah, but we were busy, plus we were just kids.”

Allura tilted her head, “There are plenty of romantic relationships that don’t have sexual intercourse or physical intimacy. There’s a lot of different kinds of relationships out there besides your cut and dry human ones”

“That’s the whole point! Where are the lines? The boundaries? It feels like Keith and I have crossed them all except for the really intimate stuff. What is the difference between a romantic ace relationship and a platonic one? Is it just feelings? Intentions? Have we really been dating this entire time?” 

Allura sighed, “These sounds like questions for your therapist.”

“Sorry.”

“No. No. It’s honestly fascinating that you haven’t seen all this before now.”

A pause. 

“Do you want to have sex with him.”

Lance blushed thinking about Keith pressing down on him. _Nope. Nope. Not ready to think about that._ “I’m not talking about that with you.”

“Fine,” Allura said, “But please confess first. I’ll win some bets”

“Allura!" Then, "Who said I’m confessing? I’m pushing these feelings deep, deep down. There is no way I’m wrecking my relationship with Keith over this.”

Allura rolled her eyes, “I highly doubt that’s what would happen,” then softer she said, “But take your time and figure this out. You should do that.”

“Thanks.”

“Was I helpful?” she said suddenly concerned.

“Yeah. Thank you princess.”

“It’s queen actually,” she smiled.

“Goodnight your _majesty_.”

“Goodnight loverboy.”

Land groaned as he shut down the screen. 

That was it then. Everyone thought Keith and Lance were together. And Lance? Well there was certainly something buried deep in his chest, something that wasn’t all too new either. And Keith? Keith’s gaze had always been intense, solitarily fixed on Lance. Was that too much to go on? Were his hopes too high? Lance hid his face in the couch pillows, the couch Keith had gotten him, and tried to fall asleep.

It was a long night. 

  
  


chapter three

  
  


Keith called Lance to let him know he was going to be gone for the rest of the month. Keith hadn’t been on a long mission like this in a really long time. The nervous part of him worried that Keith had somehow caught onto his growing feelings and was trying to hightail it out of there, but he reasoned with himself that that wasn’t who Keith was anymore. 

Keith knew him like the back of his own hand. But Lance reasoned with himself that Keith wasn’t psychic, that he couldn’t know what Lance kept close to his heart. Even with his appointment with Dr. Karr, he still hadn’t quite figured out where the platonic line was in Keith and his relationship. He wanted to cling to his last shred of denial for as long as possible. Because at this point that’s all that stood in the way. He knew what he was feeling and he had said it out loud to himself. Everyone else seemed to know too. But all that mattered was that Keith didn’t know.

So he went to work, he taught his classes and graded papers. He talked to his family and his friends over the phone. And he slept on the couch, because somehow the bed remained unfaceable. Three weeks later and he was in a small Garrison ship with Veronica flying towards home for the Thanksgiving break.

Lance slept most of the way there, Veronica waking him up a half and hour before they were set to land. 

She looked over at Lance, a cat-like grin stretching across her face. It was a look Lance knew too well. It meant he was about to be teased. 

“No Keith?” she said innocently enough. But Lance knew better. 

He crossed his arms instantly on the defensive. It wasn’t just Veronica’s shooting that had perfect aim. She could pinpoint a problem in an instant and she was blunt as hell. “Isn’t Axca your girlfriend? You should know that Keith and her are on the same blade mission right now.”

“But Keith always comes to our holiday events.”

“We’re Cuban,” Lance said flinging his arms in the air, “We aren’t even celebrating Thanksgiving! I’m just going home cuz I don’t know what else to do with this break.” He looked pointedly at Veronica “I don’t know why you’re going home.”

She sighed against the steering wheel which was still on autopilot, “Because I’m lonely without my girlfriend and Shiro said that if I didn’t go on break he would court martial me.” She turned to Lance, “I’m figuring that's exactly the same thing that's happening here with you.”

“One big difference,” Lance said.

“What’s that?”

“Keith is not my boyfriend.”

Veronica scoffed, “You’ve been living with _that_ for two years and you still haven’t gotten any? Jeez.”

“There’s nothing to get! He’s my friend.”

“Then why are you blushing like you’re fifteen.”

Lance covered his tomato red face with his hands “Oh my god why did I think getting a ride with you was a good idea?”

“Because I’m your favorite sister.”

Lance snorted, “You wish.”

Veronica turned back to steering, preparing to land the ship. “Seriously though. Do you really have no feelings for Keith? I thought you guys were making out last year on New Years.”

“Well we weren’t. I would have remembered that. You on the other hand had a lot to drink as I recall.”

“You also drank a lot and let me remind _you_ that you were sitting on Keith's lap.”

“It happens to be a nice place to sit.” Lance said scrunching his nose.

“You got your weird constipated face on.”

Lance felt himself reverting back into his teenage self. The kid who was relentlessly teased by four older siblings, “I’m not constipated.”

Veronica gave him her stern big sister look, “Lance what’s going on. We’ve joked about how you guys share a kidney before and you never got so peeved.”

“Well…” Lance thought about the past month. After his conversation with Allura it all seemed so obvious. But Keith had been gone this past month. What if this yearning, this missing Keith, went away when he came back? What if the next time Keith came into the bathroom because he couldn’t hold in his pee while Lance showered or Keith started sniffing his armpit or something else gross and Lance just stopped feeling those things. What if this all really was just his poor bi heart getting confused between the platonic and the romantic? What if Lance was just feeling this way because in all honesty, he hadn’t gotten anything like _that_ in a long time, selfcare or otherwise. 

“Oh my god you did seduce him?” Veronica said bursting his thoughts.

“I have not seduced him…I simply think there's a possibility that I could maybe have a slight crush on him.” Lance said trying to play it cool even if that was the exact opposite of how he was feeling. 

“That is the understatement of the century. You’ve had a crush on him since you were like thirteen and it was even worse during the war.” She pitched her voice into a imitation of Lance that could only be described as too accurate, “What? You can’t date Keith! All he likes is mullets and knives and wolves. Plus he’s into me! You can’t have him!”

Lance ignored her, knowing all too well how close to the truth that had sounded, rubbing his templing “ Nothing is happening. I might have a crush, but like, nothing is going to happen.”

“Not if you continue to deny it.”

“Ugh can we please stop now? I’ve had this conversation too many times.”

“That brings up so many flags for how right I am,” Veronica said gagging her landing, “That boy would give the world for you.”

“Keith’s not really a boy anymore,” Lance huffed. 

“You’re missing the point,” Veronica said.

She stuck out her tongue in concentration as she landed. Lance knew he did the same thing when he flew, not that he did it as often anymore. Keith and him would sometimes rent motorbikes, which was nice. Keith had gotten Lance on a couple blade missions in the past, but it wasn't his favorite thing. He would do it in a heartbeat if Keith asked. But He hadn't really flown in over a year besides small excursions home or to Altea. Keith and him had flown out to California last summer, which had been fun.

“You’re thinking about him right now aren’t you,” Veronica said sneaking a glance at him.”

“Can we stop now?”

She landed their small ship, “Fine fine,” she said. 

***

Lance might not celebrate or really understand Thanksgiving, but he did appreciate going home. Their farmhouse smelled like his mother’s cooking and hay and laundry and sunshine, in a word, perfection. 

Lance was quickly scooped up into his mother’s embrace. 

“Look at you!” she said squishing his cheeks between her worn palms, “Are you eating enough?”

“Yes Mama,” Lance said letting Veronica get her fair share of coddling.

Rachel snuck up behind him, elbowing him in the side, “Mama’s boy.” she coughed. 

“You’re just jealous I’m the favorite,” he whispered back, which earned him another elbow to the gut.

“Where’s Keith,” Lance’s mom said looking behind him, as if he was hiding there. As if he could somehow hide behind him. Lance wasn’t small, but he sometimes felt like a stick in comparison to Keith’s “grizzeledness” as he called it. 

“He’s on a mission mama.” Lance said rolling his eyes. He swore she almost liked Keith more than she liked him. 

“Oh that’s too bad,” she said, “I wanted to make sure he was eating well too. His mother worries about him.” One of the most unlikely things to come from all their paladin family get togethers was the bond between Lance’s mom and Keith’s. Krolia still called Lance a loud mouth from time to time, even if she was much less harsh towards him than during the war. But Krolia took instantly to Lance’s mother, and vice versa. They even talked on the phone.

“He’s such a nice young man,” his mother said drifting back to the kitchen to finish dinner. “You’re very lucky to have him Lance.”

Veronica gave Lance a shit eating grin. Lance made to punch her but she dodged fluidly. 

  
  


***

Being home turned out to be just what Lance needed. For one, he slept great there with the sounds of the farm and rain and his family around him. He also got to visit with Kaltenecker and all of his favorite animals. He even helped out Luis and his father in the field, the work was backbreaking, but somehow relaxing.

But the thing was, Lance’s feelings weren’t going away. Sure he was happy to be home, enjoying himself even. But the longing, no it was worse than that, Lance was positively _pining_ , yearning. And this yearning he was doing for Keith was ridiculous. He would sigh and look at his phone waiting for a text message or a video call to come in. And then when Keith did send one, a photo of him and his mom, a photo of Kosmo running in circles like a puppy, a picture of the sunset, Lance would sigh again. Veronica and Rachel started going around and sighing when he entered rooms, just to tease him. 

He knew it was bad after their first video call. He had felt somehow both giddy and sad to see Keith log off. And nothing really eased the pain in his chest. It was a constant pain sitting in his heart, turning his mind over. He flipped through his memories: memories of them getting ice cream on summer nights, hanging out at the beach by his house, winter days snuggled with Kosmo in bed. And older memories began cropping up: memories them holding hands after their first big battle, the one that scared Lance’s back, Keith leaving for the blades and coming to Lance’s room before take off, hugging but leaving so much unsaid, of Lance sneaking into Keith’s hospital bed after the battle with Sendak. 

Lance had to admit it. What he felt for Keith was deeper than anything he had ever felt for anyone. He wanted what they had to continue, but he also wondered what would happen if he asked for more. If he was allowed to hold Keith closer to his heart than he already did. 

That was until the Garrison Trio Group Chat happened. 

Garrison Trio Group Chat

L: Happy Thanksgiving my American friends

P: Bitch I’m Italian 

L: Does your family celebrate the weird food holiday that is Thanksgiving?

P: …

L: Then you ‘merican

H: Happy Thanksgiving! My mom’s cooking and I’m so excited!!!

L: Because you don’t have to cook for once? Cute

H: That and like, I miss her cooking :)

P: You two are such mama’s boys

L: Say...are you still grounded?

P: Please stop talking to me

L: Never >:)

H: Did Keith get time off? I know he said wanting his mom to have a Thanksgiving like his dad used to do with her

L: No. The stinky blades have him on a mission

L: But lol look we got a new couch

Lance sent a photo he had snuck of Keith asleep on their couch, hair stuck up in all directions.

P: Yuck I don’t want to see your secret stash of Keith photos

L: I do not have a secret stash! I took one photo! One!!!

H: I think it’s cute

P: Humph

L: Actually guys… I do have of have something I want to discuss

P: You are finally going to accept Chip as a member of my family

L: Keep your creepy robot out of this

H: Go ahead Lance

L: Thank you! 

L: I Uh

L: I think

L: Well I’m pretty sure

L: I have a crush on Keith

Nothing. No text, no dots. Silence. Lance didn’t want to panic. He had simply wanted to tell his oldest and best friends in the world what he was feeling. He hadn’t expected dead silence. 

Then finally...

P: You say this like we didn’t know

H: Yeah. Sorry buddy. This isn’t news to us

L: Really? You guys too? Come on! Am I the last person to figure this out? 

P: YES

H: Yes

L: …

H: Good heavens I am way too old for this. We literally had this same conversation when we were 12

P: Hunk spilling the tea

L: There is no TEA here. I just wanted to tell you guys

L: I’m still figuring it out okay!

P: You mean you weren’t sucking face at New Years?

H: Or sneaking off during Christmas?

L: NO! I haven’t even talked about this to Keith okay. And I don’t know if I will! I just needed to tell somebody

H: Well we got your back man

P: I don’t! If you guys really haven’t been hooking up and if you have really been this oblivious this entire time I say go to romance hell.

L: Wow u used a period. I can feel the anger

P: Good.

H: Pidge!

P: I don’t see what the problem is

H: I think he gets it

P: Fine.

L: Don’t say anything to Keith. Not even hints

P: You aren’t going to wait until you think he likes you are you?

L: … I can’t just confess can I?

P: You're a 29 year old man. YOU CAN DO THAT

L: Debatable

H: … just don’t wait too long

L: Why?

Hunk sent a photo. It was a little fuzzy but it was clearly of Keith standing next to some tall dude, half Galran by the look of it. They were standing close, the Galran whispering something in Keith’s ear, Keith face uncharacteristically, if not soft, unguarded. Lance felt the breath sucked out of his body a pain settled by his heart. It wasn’t shooting pain, it was more like something had nestled into his heart, eating at him tick by tick. 

H: I wasn't going to say anything. But Romelle was on a diplomatic mission and saw Keith and sent this to me… we don’t know who the guy is

L: Why didn’t you tell me to begin with?

H: I thought you two were low-key together...so like if you were keith then like I wasn’t worried about it

H: But I’m not concerned because, you know

L: You know?

H: ...

P: He doesn’t know

H: Just know I’m sighing very loudly right now

H: Just. Talk to Keith. Please

P: Please

L: Uh huh

Lanced sighed. It was bad. Really bad. If Pidge knew, Pidge who had no idea the first time he had had a crush back on the Castle of Lions, then yeah, it was really bad. But even worse was just his feelings. Because the more he realized just how much he cared for Keith and how long he had been feeling this way, his feelings seemed to get closer to spilling over, threatening to burst out of his mouth at any moment. They simply felt uncontainable. And for Lance and his big mouth, that just was never a good sign. 

  
  


chapter four

  
  


The weeks went by. Lance went back to work, worrying and waiting for Keith to come home. Every day Keith wasn’t there his sense of restlessness worsened. But even worse than this longing was the sense of dread, what was he going to do when Keith got back? He worried he would open his mouth and accidentally bare his soul. But the alternative seemed just as bad, clamming up to the point he was awkward and stiff. He went through both scenarios, wearing down the carpet as he paced. Either option seemed like it would threaten the thread of their relationship to the point where it would snap. 

But finally, finally, it was the day before Keith promised to be home. He was hitching a ride with an incoming Garrison flight that would be arriving after Lance’s afternoon classes. He promised to meet Keith at the space port and give him and Kosmo a ride back to their apartment. 

Needless to say, the certainty of knowing that Keith would be coming back that next day was driving Lance’s stomach into knots. He had pretty much taken up camp on the couch. Lance felt like he was facing a double edged sword when he looked at the bed it wrapped up in both his feelings for Keith and his longing to see him. 

It represented the lines they had crossed, the domesity they had fallen into. It represented everything their relationship was, trust, how they comforted each other, how they relied on each other. The bed was wrapped up in his feelings. But it also represented Keith’s absence, how Lance couldn’t function well without Keith. Keith's shape was gone from the pillow, his scent had faded away too. It was a reminder of everything Lance wanted but couldn’t seem to obtain. 

It was true that they often woke up wrapped in each other’s limbs, Keith clinging and rolling on top of Lance or Lance curling onto Keith’s warm chest, fingers unconsciously tightening around the fabric of Keith’s shirt. Would it be so wrong to wish they started their night like this, wrapped up in each other arms, instead of their bodies unconsciously reaching out for each other?

So Lance avoided the bed. It felt wrong to sleep there without telling Keith what was in his heart, and it felt even worse worrying and waiting for Keith to come back. 

Lance felt his phone buzz from where he clutched it against his chest. He shifted to answer it.

Keith's face blipped onto the screen.

Lance scrambled to sit up, “Oh hey Keith, hi my man.”

A small grin lit up Keith's face, sending Lance heart to the bottom of his stomach.

“Thought you would be up. You could never sleep when you were excited.”

“Who’s excited? Ha ha not me!” Lance mocked but it came out too high pitched, “Maybe I’m excited for Kosmo.”

Keith snorted. Then his eyes registered something and his smile turned into a familiar scowl. “Lance you’re on the couch again.”

“I was just watching tv.”

“No you weren’t you liar.” Keith said. Because nobody could peel away Lance’s facade as easily as Keith was able to.

Lance scratched at his back, “It’s just a nice couch.”

Keith was not deterred “You’re either going to explain to me what’s going on or I insist you talk to Dr. Karr. Or at least Shiro.”

Lance waved him off. He wondered how long he could keep his real secret under lock and key. He was very much doubting his abilities. “Are you on the ship yet?”

“We took off a couple of hours ago. Just wanted to let you know I was on my way.”

“Where is my favorite puppy?” Lance said using the baby voice he always used with Kosmo.

“Probably terrorizing part of the crew.”

Lance flicked a gaze at Keith. Just Keith on the _screen_ did things to Lance. He didn’t know how he would contain himself when Keith was there looming into his space. 

A pause.

“I miss him,” Lance said.

“Well he misses you,” Keith said sure and quick as ever. Lance wondered if he really caught on to what Lance meant. It felt like he had. It felt too close to the truth, like he was tiptoeing too close. He needed a diversion.

Lance gave a grin, “Give him a kiss for me.”

Keith rolled his eyes, quickly fed up, “Well I’m gonna get some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

And because Lance couldn't help himself he gave Keith a wink, “Don’t forget to pass on my kiss.”

“Bye Lance.”

“Bye Mullet,” Lance said saluting Keith off as the other man grumbled, “It’s not a mullet.”

When his screen went dark Lance let out a sound between a sigh and a wheeze.

Yeah. He had it really bad. His feelings were threatening a heart palpitation just by talking to Keith over the phone. How would he ever survive tomorrow? Or the next day or the next. Lance sermized that by the end of the week he would be dead from Keith's presence.

  
  


***

Being on Garrison staff, Lance was allowed to wait at the government space port for Keith to arrive. Keith was ironically coming in with a cargo ship, which would be docking in the older loading section of the port. 

Lance’s heart skipped a beat as the small ship came into view and slowly landed. The breeze from the ship whipped dust around Lance and he had to cover his eyes while waiting for it to settle. The loading team docked the ship and set up a ramp for the crew to descend. 

Lance edged closer as the door opened. The first person came through. It wasn’t Keith. Lance let out a breath, trying to calm his heart. 

Boxes of cargo and shipmates came out of the hold, but no sign of Keith. More Garrison crew members took over the landing strip with carts to take the cargo away. 

Lance took out his phone to double check the flight number Keith’s estimated time of arrival. He double checked and triple checked. 

This was the right ship. But Keith wasn’t here. Anxiousness spiraled up Lance’s spine. 

But then, descending the ramp was Keith. He was in causal gear, wearing the dark leather jacket Lance had thrifted for him along with boots and a usual low ponytail. Kosmo was at his side, sniffing down the ramp. Keith swiveled his head from side to side, his eyes cold and focused, looking for Lance. He must not have recognized him in the sea of green and orange military suits. 

Lance let a small smile slip on his face before tucking it away. He waved his hand over his head, “Keith!” he called. 

Keith’s eyes snapped to Lance’s and he smiled. It was a smile that could unfreeze hell with it’s warmth. 

_Damn_. Lance thought. 

Lance opened his arms as Keith came closer, “Hey man,” he said. 

_Pop._ Lighting cracked through the air and suddenly Lance had arms full of dog. Lance staggered under Kosmo’s weight as the space wolf attempted to lick his face. Lance laughed and squeezed tight, trying to hold up the probably two-hundred pound puppy. 

“Kosmo!” Keith said firmly. 

With one last lick, Kosmo zapped out of Lance’s arms and to Keith’s side, his tail still wagging. 

Lance wiped his face, trying to comb his bangs down from the slobbery mess they now were. 

“Yeah, I think he missed me,” Lance said looking up to Keith. 

And Keith was there looming close, his sunny smile now a smirk. Keith tentatively reached out a arm. 

“I’m home,” he said, dark eyes changing to purple as they caught the light of the setting sun. 

Lance felt his heart stutter out. “You’re here.” 

Lance opened his arms up ready to practically fall into Keith’s embrace.

“Keith,” a voice called out, “Lance!”

Arms still opened, Keith swiveled to the voice. Lance felt himself deflated a little but turned. 

Shiro sweeped them both up into a hug, his metal arm squeezing Lance against his chest. 

“Can’t. Breathe.”

“Sorry,” Shiro chuckled letting them both go. “Looking sharp Keith,” he said giving his brother a once over. 

“What is someone as important as you coming to see a humble blade member,” Keith said with a playful smirk. 

“Yeah, future General, what brings you here,” Lance added.

Shiro turned to Keith, “If I didn’t come to greet you who knows when I would have seen my brother.”

Keith rolled his eyes, “I had dinner with you and Adam a month ago.”

“Two months ago,” Shrio corrected, “Which means I wasn’t able to give you your birthday gift.”

“You didn’t have to do that Shiro.”

“Of course I do, I’m getting paid well and I want to spoil my family,” Shiro said his brows knitted. The man would give the shirt off his back if Keith or Lance wanted it. Sometimes he felt he didn’t deserve someone as kind as Shiro to be his friend and mentor. 

“So what did you get him,” Lance asked. 

Shiro grinned, “Oh, you’ll see.”

***

  
  


Shiro led them to higher-officer’s parking garage. Inside, parked right at the front, was the old, red hoverbike. 

“You didn’t,” Keith said, his voice low. 

“Well, I didn’t. But Hunk and Pidge helped me out.”

Keith turned to Lance. 

“Don’t look at me, I had nothing to do with it.”

Keith looked back at Shrio before throwing himself into another hug.

“You like it that much huh?”

“You are literally the best brother ever.”

“I know,” Shrio said, “And I had it tricked out so it’s faster now too.”

Keith's smile seemed to crackle with uncontainable glee. 

Shiro helped Keith load the bike into the back of Lance’s truck. They promised Shiro they would come to dinner sometime soon and started home. 

The drive felt long to Lance. He kept flicking his eyes towards Keith, his mind racing, _Keith’s here, Keith’s here, Keith’s here_ . He wanted to reach out for Keith’s hand, what he really wanted was that hug that had _almost_ happened, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. They didn’t just _hold hands_ like that. 

As soon as they got home, Keith wanted to ride the bike. 

“You can ride the old one,” Keith said.

Pidge had cobbled together a hoverbike for Keith a few years back, but Keith was always claiming it just wasn’t like his original bike. Lance always suspected it was due to nostalgia rather than not being as good as the old one. 

“Have you eaten, slept,” Lance said raising an eyebrow. “Have you even peed in the last twenty-four hours?”

But Keith ignored Lance. As soon as Kosmo was in the apartment along with his bag, Keith was pulling Lance back outside. 

“Can I at least change first,” Lance tugged his sleeve back, “Jeez,” he said as Keith tried to push Lance to the front door. 

He changed quickly into a standard button down and jeans. Keith was at the door tapping his foot impatiently. 

“Alright hot-head,” Lance said, “Let’s get out there.” 

Lance slung an arm over Keith’s shoulder as they made their way to their apartment’s garage. With just this small connection, the tension between them finally broke. Lance let out a sigh of relief, hoping that maybe things _could_ go back to normal despite his hammering heart. 

  
  


***

They rode out to the desert, far away from the bustle of the rebuilt metropolis. Even with reconstruction, the desert around where the Blue Lion had been found still remained desolate. And it made for great, off-the-rails hoverbiking.

“Think you can keep up?” Keith said revving his engine.

“You know it.” Lance said testing his own, “Ready to eat my dust?”

“Ha, you wish.” And Keith blasted off. 

“No fair!” Lance laughed quickly starting the gas to catch up.

Keith looked over his shoulder, a competitive glint in his eye, and as soon as Lance was on his tail, he revved into high gear. Luckily Lance’s bike still held up, being one of Pidge’s creations, and they were neck and neck whipping through the desert. 

Lance couldn’t help but stare at Keith, who was all smiles and confidence as he rushed around the bends. 

The stars were just beginning to light up the sky when they finally drove back toward the cliff where they had started their race. Keith stopped, overlooking the horizon, Lance pulling up behind him. 

Lance pulled off his helmet, trying to comb through his sweaty bangs, “I definitely won that one,” he prattled loudly. 

Keith snorted, “Sure you did.”

“If I didn’t win, why were you behind me so much?” Lance gave a fake gasp, “You weren’t just staring at my butt now were you?”

Lance didn’t have to see Keith to know he was rolling his eyes. Lance put his hands in his pockets and came up beside Keith. 

Keith met his gaze, strong and sure and open. They had grown so much over the years. It was easy to see why anyone would fall for Keith. But Lance, well, he loved _this_ Keith. He had wanted to be close to every version of Keith so far, and he wanted to be with every version of Keith that was to come. 

“We’ve been to so many places,” Keith said softly, “Maybe I’m biased, but Earth really might be the most beautiful.”

Lance’s tongue felt thick, “Earth really is neat,” he said lamely. 

Keith opened his mouth as if to say something. 

Did Keith feel this too? Lance wondered. That there was so much unsaid between them? Lance wanted to ask, but the moment disappeared and Keith looked away. 

“Want to head back?” Lance asked. 

“Yeah,” Keith said. He turned away from Lance.

As they drove back, Lance stared at Keith’s back. Was there tension there? Did Keith really have something to say? Or was Lance reading too far into everything? Something sunk in Lance’s stomach. Keith had been with the blades more and more, and then there was that picture Hunk had passed along, what if Keith was going to leave him again? Lance didn’t want to imagine it, but the more he worried about it, the more it seemed like a real possibility. 

He could just ask Keith, can’t he? Lance thought. They are adults. They live together. Lance was allowed to be a little nosy. He was allowed to ask about Keith’s love life or if their situation would change. He was probably just overthinking everything. Right?

The questions bounced around his head as they came back up to the apartment. Lance ultimately decided that no, he was not going to ask Keith any of his nosy questions. 

Lance shucked off his sneakers, ready to go to the kitchen and forget those thoughts even crossed his mind. He turned back to Keith, watching as he peeled his boots off. 

There was a buzz and Keith reached for his phone. 

And he _smiled_ at it. 

Keith never smiled at texts. He always looked confused or worried, his “resting bitch face” as Lance loved to tease. 

_That can mean only one thing_ , Lance’s mind raced. 

It came out of Lance’s mouth before he could stop himself. “Romelle told Hunk that she saw you with someone? Are you seeing someone?”

Keith paused for a moment coming back to his senses. “What are you talking about?”

“Romelle saw you with a dude and sent a photo to Hunk and then Hunk asked me if you were seeing him, or anybody, and I couldn’t answer him and so I wondered…” Lance ramble caught in his throat. 

Keith paused another moment as if pondering all the people he was chummy with, which Lance had thought, to this point, hadn’t been a lot of people.

“Hunk must have seen me with Diplomat Marzak. We were going over classified information a lot last phoeb.”

Lance pulled out his phone showing the picture that, yes, had been saved. “This is talking about classified information?” Lance said his voice pitching. Stars, he sounded like a wounded lover. He had no right to accuse Keith of anything. 

Keith fixed Lance with a molten stare, “Why does it matter Lance?”

"Well who were you texting just now?"

"My mom. Lance. Why does it matter?"

Lance shrugged trying to back himself out of the hole he dug for himself. “Hunk asked and then I was wondering if you were seeing someone. Because I don’t know, and that’s weird right? Like I should know.”

Keith stepped toward Lance. 

“I just wanted to know I guess,” Lance finished scratching at his back. It had become a habit when he was nervous to scratch at the old wound. 

Keith paused contemplating.

The silence stretched between them.

And since Lance just couldn’t keep his mouth shut he continued, “I saw the photo and I just realized that I really didn't like that.”

“Why?”

“It’s the idea of you dating someone," Lance said quickly. 

_Crap, what had he gotten himself into._ Lance looked up. 

Keith continued to stare at Lance baffled. Lance could see the cogs turning under his dumb mullet. 

“You _just_ realized…” he repeated. 

Lance turned away then, pacing down the hall, “Shit. I didn’t want to tell you this, not now. We finally got on the same page. We’re finally happy,” the words tumbled out of Lance. He felt stupid, like a teenager with too many emotions and not the right words to understand or explain them. This was a Lance that had existed when Keith hadn’t been honest and open. 

But they didn’t have these guards up now. 

He turned back to Keith.

He had already said too much. And if he was going to air all his shit now, he might as well just say it all. 

“I don't want to lose this relationship.” 

Some part of Lance was telling him to run like hell, but he ignored the feeling and met Keith’s eyes. “I think I like you. Again.” he said.

Finally done, he looked away. 

Keith’s eyes stared on, he could feel that deep stare even if he was unwilling to meet his gaze. The longer the silence went on, the worse that stare felt. Lance turned hiding his face which he knew was blushing too deeply for a man near in his thirties.

“What do you mean again?” It came out so ragged that Lance almost turned back.

Lance tried to make himself sound nonchalant, “You know, back in the day, I had a crush on you.”

“When?”

“I don’t know. Sometime after I went to Red I guess.”

Keith didn’t reply. The silence stretched into something awkward and unwieldy. _And Keith didn’t say anything._ Lance’s heart seemed to claw up his chest and into his throat. Then embarrassment flashed through him. Keith didn’t feel the same way. 

“You know what?” Lance said pacing toward the kitchen, “Forget it. I’m sorry. Just forget it. That was wrong of me to spring that all on you, so let's just forget it.”

Keith’s hand caught his wrist, spinning him around. Keith was there, edging into Lance’s space, his smoky sent, like a campfire filling Lance’s nose. 

“What if I don't want to forget,” Keith said.

Keith held onto Lance’s wrist, his grip solid but loose. He brought Lance's hand to his own chest, cradling it like a treasure. Lance searched his eyes for something, for some answer as to what Keith could mean by this. 

“You don’t want to forget?” Lance said.

“You absolute dumbass,” Keith grumbled. “Why do you think I would _not_ want to remember?”

Lance scoffed, “I don’t know what you want Keith.”

“Do I need to say it?” 

Lance could feel Keith’s breath against his cheek as they leaned into each other. 

“Well. I thought we...I thought you were happy the way things were.”

“I _do_ like things the way they are, but…”

They edged closer. Lance could feel an arm wrapping around his back, firm against his scar. Lance dared to wrap an arm around Keith’s neck.

“But?” Lance repeated.

Keith looked down unafraid. Lance didn’t move, didn’t breath, waiting for Keith to say something. 

“Lance. I have loved you for a really long time.”

Something sparked alive in Lance’s chest. _Keith was in love with him. Had been in love with him._ It felt so obvious and at the same time so unreal. 

“Then why didn’t _you_ say something?”

Keith sighed, “We were happy. I was happy. I thought I didn’t need anything more.”

Something broke inside Lance then, “You weren’t going to wait for me were you? Just not get involved with anyone because you were waiting.”

“Lance…”

Lance pulled back, “Keith. No. You just. You can’t just say you were in love with me and confide that you were never going to tell me and just make do.”

Keith scowled, “Who said I wasn’t going to tell you?”

“It’s been ten years, you had chances.”

“What about you? You had chances!”

Lance laughed, the sound spilling into giggles. He tucked his head into Keith’s chest. “This is not funny.” He said, “We are so dumb.”

Keith tucked his chin over Lance’s head, “I wasn’t waiting, okay. My future is with you, whatever form that’s in.”

“Keith…” Lance sighed.

“Lance?”

“Please never hold back anything. You’re too selfless.”

Keith snorted at that, “Calling the kettle black are we McClain?”

Lance pulled back meeting Keith gaze, “I mean it.”

Keith caught Lance’s chin, “I mean what I said too.”

“What?” Lance said, a smirk pulling at his lips, “That you love me?”

“Yes,” Keith said earnestly. “Because I do. I am in love with you.”

_Wow._ Lance could see why Keith’s fangirls were always swooning around him back in the day. 

“Me too,” Lance whispered. He pressed himself tighter to Keith, dragging a hand along the other's cheek and into his hair. Keith moved to cup Lance's face, his other hand still on Lance’s back, moving lower to his waist. 

Keith leaned closer until Lance could feel his breath on his lips. He unconsciously parted his mouth. 

“Can I kiss you?” Keith whispered, a breath away. 

“Holy crow. Yes.”

“You’re ruining the moment.” 

“Beg to differ.” 

Lips touched, light at first. Lance felt something akin to electricity race up his spine. Lance parted his lips and Keith was there to meet him, pulling him ever closer, clutching at Lance’s shirt, like he would try to get away. Lance curled his hands into Keith’s hair, marveling at how right it felt. How good it felt. He couldn’t imagine ever wanting to _not_ kiss Keith. 

They parted, Lance gasping for air before tugging Keith back to him. Keith made a pleased sound, which hummed through Lance. 

Lance hadn’t known it, but he had waited for this for so long. It was the confirmation of everything he had already had with Keith. They hadn’t needed to kiss, not really, but this was something that Lance had unknowingly hungered for.

Lance gasped as Keith bit his lip. Lance did his best not to smile into the kiss as Keith’s hands traveled up and down his back, tracing the scar underneath his shirt. They took a step backward, Lance following like a magnet. Then Keith swiveled them, pushing Lance’s legs against the couch. He clung to Keith’s neck, pulling him closer, into him. 

And Keith pushed back harder, because it was always this push and pull between them. Lance toppled against air, bending backwards over the couch. He clutched at Keith with a shriek and together they tumbled onto the cushions.

Lance laughed at their tangle of limbs, meeting Keith’s eye, which were bright and warm. How could he ever have thought of Keith as closed off he wondered. His mysteries were right there just below the surface. He kissed the edge of his eyebrow, his scar, then his mouth again, because he really couldn’t get enough. 

Finally they pulled apart, Keith adjusted them so they were side by side, Keith squished into the pillows behind him, Lance up against his chest. Keith stared into Lance’s eyes then bent down to kiss the collar bone that was poking out from Lance’s shirt. Warmth bubbled up into his chest, because this, _this_ was really nice. 

“We really should have figured this out sooner, “Keith said.

Lance looped his leg around Keith’s hip, “Yeah.”

Then, “Holy Crow, are we dating now.”

Keith rolled his eyes, “Are you really asking me that.”

“Just making sure.”

He brought Lance’s hands to his lips, kissing the knuckles then then splaying his hand out to kiss his palm. “If you’ll have me.”

“Only if you’ll have me.”

Keith smiled at that, “Definitely.”

Lance leaned into Keith pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. “Good. Because we have a lot of ground to make up.”

Keith cocked a brow. 

“I am going to woo you Keith. Movie dates, homemade dinners, walks in the park.”

“I hate to break it to you, but we do all that already.”

“Well now we’re going to do it holding hands.” Lance brought up his hand and Keith instantly wound his fingers into Lance’s, squeezing softly. 

“I like the sound of that,” Keith said. 

And then Keith was leaning in again, kissing Lance’s now slightly swollen lips. Lance hummed into the kiss. 

“I have to feed Kosmo,” Keith said after a while, dragging a hand through Lance’s hair. 

“He’s asleep.”

“Why did you teach him it was okay to steal the bed,” Keith grumbled. 

“He’s a good snuggle buddy.”

“Well you have me now,” Keith said. 

Lance smiled into Keith’s shoulder. “Mhmm.” 

They stayed like that for awhile, curled into each other. The adrenaline trailed out of Lance and his lashes began to flutter. He realized then, just how tired he was, and how now, he felt utterly safe. Keith and him might have just shared an apartment together, but in reality, Lance was making _Keith_ his home. Maybe it was too cheesy, but the idea of Keith as his home singed inside his chest. 

Lance let himself fall asleep to the sound of Keith’s pulse. 

  
  
  


epilogue 

  
  


“I missed this,” Lance said. It was weeks after his confession and Keith had just gotten back from another blade mission. Keith had showered and they were now in their bed, Keith’s arms wrapped around Lance’s waist, back to chest. 

“Please let me sleep,” Keith said against Lance’s ear. 

“Who said I wasn’t?” 

“Uh huh.”

Lance let out a fake gasp, wiggling in Keith’s grip till he was turned around to face him, “Excuse me, I’m tired too. And I’m just trying to tell my boyfriend how much I love him.”

“There you go again,” Keith said. He leaned into Lance, “Always so loud.”

“Maybe you can shut me up then,” Lance said with a cocky grin. 

“I have a feeling this was your plan all along.”

“Maybe so,” Lance said.

Keith pretended to grumble, but he pulled Lance against him, kissing him lazily. Sleep dropped away as touches grew more forward, hands pulling up shirts, skin sliding against skin. Tongues met lips and teeth, breath coming out in pants. Lance let his hands travel down Keith’s muscled stomach. 

And then there was the buzz of a phone. 

Both groaned, Lance slapped backwards, trying to turn the thing off. 

He must have hit accept, because a voice came over the speaker, “Lance?” 

Lance flipped over, “Shit. Shit.”

“Lance?” 

“Hunk, buddy,” Lance said through his teeth, “I’m kind of busy.”

Lance looked at the screen. Behind Hunk was Allura, Coran and Shiro. Lance had forgotten there was some big diplomate state dinner on Altea tonight. Keith was supposed to be there too, but Lance had convinced him to ditch and send Axca instead, as she was the real leader of the blades. And there behind the crowd of faces was Axca, Veronica with the gang. 

“Shit,” Lance said under his breath, hoping the state of his face and hair didn’t give too much away. 

“Who’s behind you…” Hunk said, before a grin spread over his face, “Oh hi Keith.”

Keith popped his head over Lance’s shoulder, “I was trying to sleep Hunk.”

Veronica pressed forward, “Looks like you were trying to do something alright.”

Lance swung the phone away from his face. “No offence buddy, but I’m going to hang up now.”

“Who confessed?” Allura said pressing closer to the screen, “Did I win the bet?”

“It was kind of a joint thing,” Lance said, not daring to pull the phone back into view. 

“No it wasn’t,” Keith said elbowing him, “You basically were a rambling mess.”

“Ha! Pay up Shiro,” Allura said, glee very much evident. 

“Shiro? Really?” Keith said. 

“I’m very disappointed in you Keith. I had a lot of faith in you.”

“You just thought he was impatient,” Allura said. 

“Is that a hickey?” Hunk said.

Lance groaned, “Okay. Bye then.”

“Don’t get up to too much trouble,” Veronica called. 

Lance clicked the phone off before anyone else could chime into that. 

“At least that’s done,” Lance said. 

“You didn’t want to tell people,” Keith said, dragging Lance back into him. 

“Oh no. I want everyone to know. I just knew it would be annoying.” Lance scrunched up his nose. “But I mean I’ve already bragged about you to several of my subordinates. They are very much sick of you.”

“But you aren't,” Keith said against his lips. 

“Never.” Lance said smiling into the kiss. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you guys enjoyed this. I wish I could have made Keith more present in the fic, but I hope this is okay. Comments and kudos are very much welcomed :)


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